In his popular Coronavirus Rhapsody parody, Raúl Irabién advises that we “Gotta lay low, masturbate” as a way to stop the spread of the (mostly harmless) virus.
Seems that the New York City Health Department would agree. In a recent report they advise that in this time of COVID “you are your safest sex partner.”
Such relationship-distancing advice falls inline with the WHO recommending that the nations of the world start teaching children from ages 0 to 4 about masturbation.
Isolation and masturbation. That’s certainly one way to reduce the population. After all, population control is part of this COVID-19(84) Agenda, isn’t it?
“The world today has 6.8 billion people. That’s headed up to about nine billion,” says Bill Gates. “Now, if we do a really great job on new vaccines, health care, reproductive health services, we could lower that by perhaps 10 or 15 percent.”
Since everybody is forwarding us these cute songs celebrating totalitarian rule, maybe forward them this post for another perspective? And don’t fret if they call you an Irresponsible, Lunatic Conspiracy Theorists.
About the Author: John C. A. Manley is the author of the full-length novel, Much Ado About Corona: Dystopian Love Story. He is currently working on the sequel, Brave New Normal, while living in Stratford Ontario, with his wife Nicole and son Jonah. You can 